Mentored by the Best: My Best Friend, That Is

I love the wide bike lanes in Draper. Shawn and I can ride side by side on most of the roads we cycle. On the roads with a narrow shoulder, he always insists that I go ahead. He often proves that chivalry is not dead. He says he likes the view. But I know better. This is how he leads. When he taught me the ins and outs of cycling and the rules of the road, he would briefly edge in front of me to demonstrate, and then slip into place behind me, letting me set the pace. This is how he is. He leads from behind, like a shepherd driving his flock. He is an amazing leader, teacher and example. I'm often vocal, animated, and larger than life. He happily encourages me to be the visible one--the one out front. He prefers silent anonimity. If there is something great to accomplish, and we set out to do it together, rest assured, he is the driving force behind making it happen. The truth is that he is my better half, observant, thoughtful and kind. On our rides, I watch his shadow touch mine and marvel at how blessed I am to go through life with him. Tonight as we made our way home from a ride just as the sun was setting, I looked at him as the sun shone across his face. I was overwhelmed with gratitude and love for him. In that moment, I began thinking about how all the cool things I know, I learned from him.

Before I met him I didn't even know how to mow a lawn. Crazy, I know. I had no brothers and my dad loved his Honda mower too much to let his daughters mar its awesomeness. A week after a brief mowing lesson, Shawn arrived home to see me finishing up the back yard. He saw me pushing with all my might and chuckled as he walked up and held down little bar that turns on the "self propelling" feature. I guess I missed that part of the previous instruction. I wondered why it seemed so hard. He was pleased with my effort nonetheless and praised me for my attempt at mowing neat lines.

Never before had I been rock climbing. He was excited to introduce me to one of his passions. He beamed as I donned my first climbing shoes and a harness. He belayed me with a patient and encouraging attitude when I took my first overhang and struggled against it for what seemed like an hour of total frustration. He smiled at my hard-headedness and didn't ask me to quit. He congratulated me when I was able to tie a figure eight knot myself and was out of his head ecstatic when I knew the climbing jargon and could speak his language, put on all my own gear and make it to the top.

He taught me to rappel, ice climb, and how to ride a motorcycle. He even rode on the back! What trust. He took me on a three day, 25 mile backpacking trip when I was five months pregnant with our eighth child. That's how much faith he has in me, that I'd be able to make it! Because of his belief, and his walking along behind me, I did! He taught me to play chess, and didn't complain when I started to beat him. He taught me how to snowboard, how to change a bike tire, how to use a camp stove and filter water out of a stream. I went to Moab for the first time in my life with Shawn. We camped and took a morning run over the slickrock at sunrise. I'll never forget it. The first time I ever saw the natural beauty of Delicate Arch was alongside him. He signed me up for an introduction to paragliding class that got me hooked. We flew the mountains of Mexico together. A couple of days ago, he installed new cycling pedals on my bike, bought me my own cycling shoes, in my size (all on his own, without my knowledge,) and taught me how to clip into the pedals. He put the bike on the grass, had me climb on and carefully held it steady as I learned how to clip in and out safely. When I mastered that, he did the same setup on the concrete driveway. When he was sure I could do it, he turned me loose to ride on the street. He complimented my aptitude. I knew it wasn't my aptitude, but the skillfull instruction of my favorite teacher.

Without his influence, undoubtedly my life would not be as wondrous and rich. Shawn and I have been reading "Driven: The Autobiography of Larry H. Miller" together this last week. We've both been teary in many parts. I don't think the tears are necessarily for the story of Larry H., but for the feeling of catching a glimpse of our future together; the confirmation of events to come. We have much to do, and in many ways, we're just getting started! Aura recently asked me how I knew that Shawn was who I'd marry. I thought back on the similarities of many of the young men I dated. Then, I thought of the great difference in Shawn. After only a couple of dates, we were discussing our visions of the future, and in no time at all it seemed, our visions became entwined. We knew we'd fulfill those visions together.

Nine kids, at least ten houses, and innumerable businesses and experiences later, we're well on our way. I hope and pray we are granted many more years to dream, plan, work, create, grow and learn together.

There is an area in which I am still greatly, or rather, grossly, lacking skill. These are cookies I made last week. Shawn, can you teach me how to cook?