Friday Night: Date Night

Shawn and I have been going on Date Night religiously, nearly every Friday night since we got married. It seems that we always live for Friday and the dedicated time we know we'll get to spend together. Our kids know it's just as a solid commitment as attending church on Sunday and plan their own activities accordingly.

Our Date Night activities vary depending on whether or not I am pregnant or nursing. With nine kids over the past 17 years, it's easy to see that being pregnant or nursing has been a constant. Partially due to those date nights, I'm sure! :) We've enjoyed many years of temple trips, movies, plays, hiking, eating out, double dating with friends, camping, staying overnight at a hotel, going for drives, parking, rock climbing, performances in the various arts, taking walks, planning or starting a business, visioning a project or goal, sitting in the hot tub at the gym, jogging, shopping, whatever. Last night was something new, and it was good!

We were on our way to the movie theater, when in conversation, we both agreed that there was really nothing worth seeing. So, we were without a plan. We decided to take a drive up Little Cottonwood Canyon to see how steep and far it is to get to Alta because Shawn has a goal of cycling to it this summer. He just summited Suncrest a couple of days ago and was looking for a new challenge. Baby Matthew was also with us, as he is nursing and would have been nursing happily at the theater. We drove to the top, talking, laughing, and having a great time, all except for Matthew who wasn't so much enjoying himself. Since there was really no place to park, and Matthew was getting increasingly displeased, we half-heartedly began the drive home. We were both sad that Date Night was ending because it really was still too early to end our date and go home. We usually stay out til midnight and often, later.

Shawn had another idea. He proposed that I just hurry and nurse Matthew and leave him with Aura at home so we could go out again. Sounded good. It was almost 11:00 PM before we were again in the car and backing out of the driveway. As we reversed, Shawn said "So, where we goin?" "I dunno," I said. No sooner had I said it, that he changed directions. Literally. He stopped the car, and put it in drive, rather than reverse. He drove straight into the backyard. We were laughing our heads off as he drove across the acre lawn and parked inconspicuously under a tree in the far corner of the back yard. He rolled down the windows, turned off the headlights and the engine and slid his seat back. We kept laughing for another ten minutes it seemed, as we had finally found a good place to park, right in our own back yard. We were completely undetected by our children who were all inside the house, expecting that we'd left again. There was something so satisfying, dangerous, and funny about that situation.

After talking for twenty minutes or so, still laughing at our stealthiness, we were eyeing the backseat. Full of stuff. Too bad. "Hey, what about the RV?" I said. In a flash, Shawn was out of the car and opening my door. We walked hand in hand back across the acre of grass, back to the driveway. We quietly opened the RV door, and slipped inside, completely under the radar.

With a cloud cover that hid the moonlight for the most part, it was very dark. Perfect for hiding out. Now that our date night was literally in our own driveway, it was extra exciting, lots of fun, and totally free! We didn't spend a dime on Date Night and had the best time ever. It topped off the night that we got to listen to the rain on the roof of the RV. It felt just like camping. At midnight, we quietly made our way back across the grass, again hand in hand, feeling the cool mist of the new fallen rain on our faces. Shawn opened the car door for me and we drove back across the lawn to park the car in the driveway. We were home. We giggled on the porch until we could keep a straight enough face to open the door.

The kids who were still awake rushed to greet us when we entered the house. They asked "Where did you go?" "Nowhere really," we said, and we meant it. :)

Amy Kenney

"Motivation" is all about the Motive

Today on my ride, I found myself contemplating the joys of the "dual present," as I like to think of it. It is a place where I am aware of myself and my temporal surroundings, but my inner world is more vivid and focused than my outer world. I see the thoughts I am dwelling on in such detail and reality, I feel as though I have transported somewhere else, all the while, the world around me bustles on. Such a useful state when the temporal present is less than desirable! :) It is like the world around me going not quite blurry, but definitely in the background, and my inner world coming to sharp focus in contrast. I was thinking about a way to visualize the state I am describing, and I would describe it as a close-up photo of a red tulip, better yet, a red tulip with a bee resting at its center, amidst an out of focus field of multi colored tulips. The flower in the foreground, and all that is happening with it, is the dual present. This is one of my favorite places to visit. My thoughts and ideas take a visual form, pictures, words and meaning flow freely, and inspiration results.

Anyway, while riding along in the dual present, my train of thought led to an in depth study of motivation. First, I thought of what motivates me, what motivates others and eventually came to the principle, the root, behind motivation; the motive. I find that I am often motivated by fun, and that through games, that I play alone, or with others, I am motivated to carry out a task, assignment, or goal. The games I play with myself are many. I laughed about one I played a few months ago at the gym, the last time I ran on the elliptical training machine.

It was 11:00 PM on a Friday night. I hadn't exercised yet that day, but was determined not to blow my perfect week. So, I forced myself into the gym after Shawn and I went on our usual Friday night date. My routine on the elliptical consists of 30 minutes running forward, and 30 minutes reversing the direction of my strides, in essence, running backwards. Long ago I mastered running without holding onto the machine for support on the steepest setting. More recently I had mastered running forward with my eyes closed, keeping my balance. I was ready for a new game to motivate the workout. I decided to step it up by closing my eyes while running backward for the duration of a whole song.

The first few strides were tricky and I teetered to keep my balance. I had been thinking about the literal battle of good and evil. I went to that state of the dual present and visualized a battle field and myself armored and vigorously fighting in it. I was conquering evil powerfully through my visual game and I made it through a whole song in my backward running, eyes closed position. When the next song started, my focus shifted. I might have even become a little giddy and congratulated myself on meeting the goal. Whatever I did, I lost my intense inner focus and suddenly lost my balance in a big way. I shot off backwards, sending my ipod soaring in the air, landing on my back on the floor, headphones dangling pitifully. It didn't really hurt, just my pride. I quickly gathered my ipod and headphones and scrambled back up onto the machine, glad that the gym was mostly empty and laughed at myself all the while.

In that moment, I got a lesson about motive. When my motive changed from doing good, even though only mentally, to being pleased with myself, I lost my ability. Motive is the root of all motivation.

Moses 1:27-29

27 And it came to pass, as the voice was still speaking, Moses cast his eyes and beheld the earth, yea, even all of it; and there was not a particle of it which he did not behold, discerning it by the spirit of God.
28 And he beheld also the inhabitants thereof, and there was not a soul which he beheld not; and he discerned them by the Spirit of God; and their numbers were great, even numberless as the sand upon the sea shore.
29 And he beheld many lands; and each land was called earth, and there were inhabitants on the face thereof.

The Power of the Playlist

On my ride, I thought about the music on my "Amy's Workout" playlist, which is what I listen to while cycling. I laughed pretty hard as I realized just how cheesy some of the stuff is that inspires me. First, I noticed a trend in that I have many songs that come from dance movies of the 80's and 90's. Well, I was a child of the 80's, so that explains a lot. Many of the dance movies, whose music now tops my playlist, I have never seen as they were rated R. So having never even seen many of the movies, why do they inspire me? I think it is because of the feelings instilled in me that directly stems from the way I dream. In my dreams, I often see myself running over mountain tops at top speed, scarcely touching earth's surface, leaping over canyons, flying upward and soaring all around. I feel inspired, limitless, and powerful when I have those dreams and the lyrics of some of those cheesy 80's songs remind me of those sensations. I have often wondered if the people who are drawn to flight and extreme physical activities that produce such amazing sensations, have a little memory or fondness for what transportation was like in heaven. Maybe we miss it and do all we can to simulate it in our temporal existence :) Some of the songs that evoke those sensations for me are:

"What A Feeling" by Irene Cara from the movie "Fame" (Forbidden 80's movie. Never seen it.) The lyrics say "Now I hear the music, close my eyes, I am rhythm, in a flash it takes hold of my heart, what a feeling, bein's believin', I can have it all now I'm dancing for my life, take your passion, and make it happen, pictures come alive, now I'm dancing through my life, what a feeling!" I have loved that song since I was about 10 years old.

"Footloose" and "I'm Free" by Kenny Loggins--just the titles alone speak to me, a free spirited freedom lover. They were both from the "Footloose" movie soundtrack. "Footloose" was filmed in my hometown of Payson, UT when I was in grade school. I clearly remember the summer when movie crews took over the town. I have a split second cameo at the beginning as the camera zooms down Utah Avenue, the "main drag" of town where my house was located. My grandpa was walking toward his truck parked outside my house, so he's in the shot too. Little did I know that years later I'd be so involved with film, called to make movies. Funny how life works out.

"Dancing in Heaven" by Orbital Bee Bop from the 80's movie "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun." Ok saw this one as middle schooler. It was pretty irreverent, much too irreverent for my tastes now. A fun fact about this movie was that it was the big break for LDS dancer/actor, Darryl Yeager who plays the dancer in the black muscle shirt in the Dtv audition scene. Darryl now owns and operates Oddyssey Dance Repertory Theater in SLC.

More recent dance movie music:

"We're Dancing" by PYT from the "Center Stage" soundtrack. Love the lyrics, "There's a passion inside An inner strength that drives Can't nobody take that away from you It's the greatest high You set the floor on fire When you come alive"

"Higher Ground" by Red Hot Chili Peppers, which could be their most spiritual song. It was also featured in "Center Stage" with lyrics that say "Gonna keep on tryin' Till I reach my highest ground...Whew! Till I reach my highest ground No one's gonna bring me down Oh no Till I reach my highest ground Don't you let nobody bring you down (they'll sho 'nuff try) God is gonna show you higher ground He's the only friend you have around"

Other stuff that just inspires me:

"All Fired Up" by Pat Benatar. Again, I am a child of the 80's enough said. Also, I do really like the lyrics "Livin' with my eyes closed, goin' day to day I never knew the difference, I never cared either way Lookin' for a reason, searchin' for a sign Reachin' out with both hands, I gotta feel the kick inside All Fired Up Now I believe there comes a time When everything just falls in line We live an' learn from our mistakes The deepest cuts are healed by faith."

"Whip It" by Devo. A true motivational, and 80's classic.

"Elevation" by U2. Love this line "Can't sing but I've got soul." It totally sums me up!

"Beautiful Day" by U2. Who's not inspired by this song? "What you don't have you don't need it now What you don't know you can feel it somehow What you don't have you don't need it now Don't need it now Was a beautiful day"

"Learning to Fly" by Foo Fighters. Reminds me of paragliding in Mexico, thermalling toward the sun. Love all the sensations that go with those memories.

Stuff I like because it's funky and it makes me smile:

"If Everybody Looked the Same" by Groove Armada

"Hot and Cold" by Katy Parry. I think the irony makes me laugh. This is one that has to be listened to from the beginning, clear until the end. "Katy, do you take Alexander to be your lawfully wedded husband? I do. Alexander, do you take Katy to be your lawfully wedded wife? Long Silence....Alexander? Silence, then the song, then after the song...."Alexander, do you? Silence. "I do." Cheers and applause.

"Freestyler" by Bom Funk MC

"Can't Stop the Rock"

"Pump Up the Volume" by MARRS. This song encapsulates that teen/highschool era.

"No Limits" I don't even know who this is by and it is total electronica. Definitely "Jock Jams" fodder. It just happened to play at a life training seminar that Shawn and I staffed while we were dating. We were dancing on a table. Great memories! "There's no limits, so reach for the sky, no valley's too deep, no mountain too high, no limits."

Stuff influenced by my teen kids:

"All the Above" by Maino. "Tell me what do you see When you looking at me On a mission to be What I'm destined to be I done been through the pain and the sorrow The struggle is nothing but love I'm a soldier, a rider, a ghetto survivor And all the above All the above How the heck could you stop me? Why in the world would you try? I go hard forever, That's just how I'm designed, That's just how I was built See the look in my eyes? You take all of this from me, And I'm still gon' survive You get truth from me" (Christian)

"Down" by Jay Sean (Aura)

"Like Whoa" by Aly and AJ (Sierra)

I just remembered that I forgot to add my favorite song in the world to my playlist! I LOVE "Symphony #9 in D Minor: Ode to Joy" by Beethoven. I am deeply moved and inspired every time I hear it. I think it is literally what heaven sounds and feels like. It makes me want to be an orchestra conductor everytime I hear it, and I'm not even musical! I'm going to add it right now. Done. Tomorrow's workout will be that much better!

Music is such a powerful force to inspire or debase. I have to have positive, uplifting, clean and inspiring music in order to have any kind of power to do difficult physical activities. Music that is any less than that is very draining, mentally and physically, as well as soul numbing. If the music isn't right, I can literally feel a physical shut down, a weakening of my overall capacity.

Battle for Souls

While writing Stand Strong, I kept receiving inspiration for themes, scenes, and songs, that had absolutely no place in the movie. It finally occurred to me as I cut scene after scene of unrelated material, that I was receiving inspiration about another film entirely. I filed these impressions away, adding to them from time to time.

The ideas that came all generated around the central theme of the literal battle for souls. Life is a battle between good and evil, from moment to moment, and in every choice, decision, experience and action. From scripture, we know that a great war in heaven ensued, and that Satan and his angels were cast out, down to earth, where the battle has been raging ever since.

Revelation 12:7-9

7 And there was war in heaven: Michael and his angels fought against the dragon; and the dragon fought and his angels,
8 And prevailed not; neither was their place found any more in heaven.
9 And the great dragon was cast out, that old serpent, called the Devil, and Satan, which deceiveth the whole world: he was cast out into the earth, and his angels were cast out with him.

In March, after much prayer on the story line for the movie, I was inspired with a rough outline of the plot. "Battle for Souls" was to be about a single mother, divorced due to the infidelity and subsequent abandonment by her husband because of a pornography addiction. Just after receiving this inspiration, I read an article from a church magazine that told the true story of a woman in an identical situation. The profession I had chosen for the character to have to support her family was even the same for the real woman in the article. I again received a spiritual confirmation that this was the story line that needed to be told to communicate the message.

Since that time, inspiration has come in bits and pieces, as mental visuals, images, words, and feelings have flooded my mind on many occasions. Some nights I have not been able to sleep as inspiration poured in rapidly and seemingly without end. Other times, inspiration was not forthcoming at all, and I waited through long periods, wondering and praying I'd be able to put it all together in time.

What I learned from Stand Strong and from numerous other projects, experiences, and life, is that faith is everything.

In the last month, I have experienced my own temporal battle for souls, in that my life has been literally spared on at least five occasions of which I am aware. I have had so many near calamities lately, and through no "fault" of my own, that I have started to wonder if I am experiencing lessons designed by God to teach me, or if the devil is trying to physically destroy me. I feel it is a little of both, along with the reminder that there is no need to fear, but to continue with faith, knowing that I won't regret pushing forward until my time is done. What I do certainly have, is a testimony of guardian angels for protection and in an appointed time to die. The fact that I am alive and able signifies to me that I am not done yet.

Ephesians 6:11-13
11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

The battle for souls is both spiritual and temporal, and the only saving armor is the full armor of God. This reminder and illustration is the purpose of the "Battle for Souls" movie.

Like "Stand Strong," "Battle for Souls" is a volunteer project comprised of Christians of all faiths united in Christ. All participants consecrate their skills, gifts, talents and abilities to glorify the Lord and to lead people to Him through the medium of film.

"Battle for Souls" will shoot August 2-14, with the exclusion of Sunday the 8th. The next week will be devoted to pick up shots for "Battle for Souls" and "Stand Strong." "Stand Strong" will premiere later this fall, and "Battle For Souls" will premiere next spring. At least, those are the target dates. We have learned that everything is ultimately on God's own timeline.

Keep the project in your prayers!