"Motivation" is all about the Motive

Today on my ride, I found myself contemplating the joys of the "dual present," as I like to think of it. It is a place where I am aware of myself and my temporal surroundings, but my inner world is more vivid and focused than my outer world. I see the thoughts I am dwelling on in such detail and reality, I feel as though I have transported somewhere else, all the while, the world around me bustles on. Such a useful state when the temporal present is less than desirable! :) It is like the world around me going not quite blurry, but definitely in the background, and my inner world coming to sharp focus in contrast. I was thinking about a way to visualize the state I am describing, and I would describe it as a close-up photo of a red tulip, better yet, a red tulip with a bee resting at its center, amidst an out of focus field of multi colored tulips. The flower in the foreground, and all that is happening with it, is the dual present. This is one of my favorite places to visit. My thoughts and ideas take a visual form, pictures, words and meaning flow freely, and inspiration results.

Anyway, while riding along in the dual present, my train of thought led to an in depth study of motivation. First, I thought of what motivates me, what motivates others and eventually came to the principle, the root, behind motivation; the motive. I find that I am often motivated by fun, and that through games, that I play alone, or with others, I am motivated to carry out a task, assignment, or goal. The games I play with myself are many. I laughed about one I played a few months ago at the gym, the last time I ran on the elliptical training machine.

It was 11:00 PM on a Friday night. I hadn't exercised yet that day, but was determined not to blow my perfect week. So, I forced myself into the gym after Shawn and I went on our usual Friday night date. My routine on the elliptical consists of 30 minutes running forward, and 30 minutes reversing the direction of my strides, in essence, running backwards. Long ago I mastered running without holding onto the machine for support on the steepest setting. More recently I had mastered running forward with my eyes closed, keeping my balance. I was ready for a new game to motivate the workout. I decided to step it up by closing my eyes while running backward for the duration of a whole song.

The first few strides were tricky and I teetered to keep my balance. I had been thinking about the literal battle of good and evil. I went to that state of the dual present and visualized a battle field and myself armored and vigorously fighting in it. I was conquering evil powerfully through my visual game and I made it through a whole song in my backward running, eyes closed position. When the next song started, my focus shifted. I might have even become a little giddy and congratulated myself on meeting the goal. Whatever I did, I lost my intense inner focus and suddenly lost my balance in a big way. I shot off backwards, sending my ipod soaring in the air, landing on my back on the floor, headphones dangling pitifully. It didn't really hurt, just my pride. I quickly gathered my ipod and headphones and scrambled back up onto the machine, glad that the gym was mostly empty and laughed at myself all the while.

In that moment, I got a lesson about motive. When my motive changed from doing good, even though only mentally, to being pleased with myself, I lost my ability. Motive is the root of all motivation.

Moses 1:27-29

27 And it came to pass, as the voice was still speaking, Moses cast his eyes and beheld the earth, yea, even all of it; and there was not a particle of it which he did not behold, discerning it by the spirit of God.
28 And he beheld also the inhabitants thereof, and there was not a soul which he beheld not; and he discerned them by the Spirit of God; and their numbers were great, even numberless as the sand upon the sea shore.
29 And he beheld many lands; and each land was called earth, and there were inhabitants on the face thereof.